The POTUS Pageant or So You Think You Can Be President by Michael Cote
CAST
Brian Anthony, Co-Host of The POTUS Pageant
Seneca Chase, Co-Host of The POTUS Pageant
Marra Blankman, Finalist, 30's - 40's, Ex-Governor of Wisconsin
Buck Shrubman, Finalist, 40's -50's paunchy Leader of Georgia
Militia Association
Fred Canady, Finalist, late 20's - 40's, Senator from
Massachusetts
The show is set on a TV soundstage with the audience as the live
studio audience. There should be three stools or chairs for the
finalists. Brian and Seneca may or may not use hand held microphones.
A glitzy red, white and blue backdrop is recommended. And it should
open with a bit of jazzy "patriotic" music.
Suggested costumes:
Brian - Tux
Seneca - Flashy evening gown
Marra - Conservative business suit, lots of pins, red, white &blue
Buck - Pseudo military uniform/camo and cigar
Fred - Business suit with loosened tie and rocks
glass of bourbon and cigarette
BRIAN: Welcome America, to The POTUS Pageant. We are on the final leg
of our journey to find out…just who will be the next…President of
the United States. My name is Brian
Anthony and I am joined by the ever lovely, Ms. Seneca Chase.
SENECA: Thank you Brian, tonight, we will meet the people that our
celebrity judges and the people of America have deemed the most worthy
to fill the seat of the highest office in the country. We've
narrowed it down from 50, one from every state in the union, to the
three finalists with us tonight.
BRIAN: That's right Seneca, and tonight, America will decide, so
without further adieu, let's meet the people competing for the
position of the most powerful person in the world.
(MUSIC)
First, the former first lady of the great state of Wisconsin. This
lady has been outstanding in the competition so far.
Never straying far from her beliefs, her outspoken flair always leaves
people thinking - about what, we're never sure. Let's have a warm
welcome for former Governor Marra Blankman.
(She stands and gives a "political wave")
SENECA: From the deep south, our second contestant is also someone
that is not afraid to share his opinions, but I guess that's kind of
a pre-requisite for this office. The leader and self-proclaimed
general of the Georgia Militia Association, let's hear it for Buck
Shrubman.
(He stands and gives a crisp salute)
BRIAN: Last, but certainly not least, from Massachusetts, this
Senator takes his politics like he takes his scotch, in liberal
doses. The front runner in the "Let's Party" Party, Fred
Canady.
(Fred ogles Seneca and makes a rude come-on gesture as he
absent-mindedly acknowledges the audience. She reacts like it's not
the first time.)
Seneca : Ewww.
Brian : I couldn't agree more, Seneca. Well, onwards and upwards as
they say. Tonight, our contestants, I mean candidates will answer one
final question, chosen at random from our studio audience, to prove to
our great nation that they are worthy to be called "President of the
United States."